Saturday, 10 September 2011

A Sex Toy won't.........

We had a bit of fun tonight coming up why we love our sex toys.
Heres a few of our favorites so far.

If you have any more please leave them as comments and I will add them to the list.



A Sextoy wont…….

1. A sex toy wont say you look fat,
2. A sex toy will still be there in the morning when you wake up.

3. A sex toy wont care if your having a bad hair day,

4. A sex toy wont nick they duvet,

5. A sex toy wont compare you to the last lover they had.

6. A sex toy wont roll over and go to sleep,

7. A sex toy wont leave shaver rash between your thighs,

8. A sex toy never has to come up for air.

9. A sex toy wont be too busy watching the footie,

10. A sex toy will never want you to swallow,

11. A sex toy doesn’t care if your wearing your Bridget Jones’s.

12. A sex toy will never compare you to Pamela Anderson,

13. A sex toy won’t ask you if it’s the best you’ve ever been with.

14. A sex toy wont mind long-term commitment.

15. A sex toy won’t ask you to sign a pre-nup.

16. A sex toy wont give you jaw-ache,

17. A sex toy will never work late at the office,

18. A sex toy will never be looking be looking over your shoulder for the football results.

19. A sex toy never feels left out if you want to bring in a 2nd or 3rd sextoy.

20. A sex toy doesn’t need to rely on viagra.

21. A sex toy wont mind if your bum “Does look big” in that.

22. A sex toy will never leave the leave the toilet seat up,

23. A sex toy will never notice that extra stone you’ve gained.

24. A sex toy will never leave the cap off the toothpaste.

25. A sex toy will never force you to lie in the wet spot.

26. A sex toy wont mind if you have a zit on your butt.

27. A sex toy wont force you to understand Monty python.

28. A sex-toy will never fall asleep halfway through.

29. A sex toy will never force you to understand the “off-side rule”.

30. A sex toy always knows its place.



Some funny ones emailed to me; thanks guys, come on lets have some more? 

1) A sex toy will never ask you how many other sex toys as you’ve been with before.
2) A sex toy never asks “ why do you need another pair of shoes”,
3) A sex toy always know where your clit or g-spot is.
4) A sex toy wont leave crumbs in the bed.
5) A sex toy always knows its place.
6) A sex toy wont mind if you haven’t waxed the bush,
7) A sex toy won’t try to put your Dutch cap on his head and start making crap Benny hill jokes.
8) A sex toy won’t tell his/her, mates how good/bad you were in bed.
9) A sex toy will never say "It’s not what it looks like..."!!!.







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